fuK!

fuck lo!
give up!
she lies!
i hate!
watever!
wasted!
called and she complained she not feeling well..
bought medicine and brought to her..
called her to pick up the medicine..
she was outside with another guy..
fuck that!
really hurt me!
anyway..
small case for me..~ hahah

downnnnnn

haizhaiz.. can u tell me why my life is so tough..??
i am so jealous..
with those ppl..
with JPAs..
with great father and mother's fund..
they can just spend and spend whatever they want..
im only 21.. but i have to overcome so many stuffs now..
money? money? and money again?
now i know why some ppl will go for do sth extreme..
coz the life forced them to the extreme..
When will this fucking life be over?

=(

no no no no!! =(
this feeling is wrong.. totally wrong
haiz haiz haiz..
why why why?
friend only o?
omg.. wrong feeling la..
should take the chance and make it clear to her!!

down..

wooppss.. is it valentine's day? wow..~ happy valentines..
valentine's day without valentines..
i dun have valentines..
well.. kinda disappointing..
having great hope will lead to severe depression..
im going down now..
i have no idea on wats going on now..
wow.. called the gal.. but she hung up so soon..
credits running out.. okie.. she aint anybody of me..
lol.. asked her whether she is coming to gym..
she said she got sth to do tonight..
oh shit lo.. valentines night.. she got sth to do.. means she got a date..
tat means she got bf liao~ =(
sakit hatinya.. hahaha..
anyway.. my target fail liao.. totally fail..
sad sad sad.. nvm.. havnt fell in deep yet..

noo!!

=( too sad.. i was thinking too much..
she is originally that hyper and sweet..
to everyone.. no exception..
kinda bad news..
aigh..
but nvm.. i tried..
thought i have one step closer..
but this step is a further away.. =(
haiz haiz..
nvm.. forget bout it then..

after CNy

being kinda busy.. and getting a little frustrated as well..
work and work and work..
study and study and study..
new year eve that night was pissed off and worked on the fucking assignment..
stupid partner has stupid opinion and still sticks with his stupid thoughts..
he just knew that he is stupid when the lecturer wants what i insisted initially..
back home 9.30pm eat all the cold food alone on the table.. as my sis and bro in law has finished eating.. okie.. ~ nothing big deal with that..
tried to call back home.. no one picked up.. okie..~ nothing big deal..
till today.. so many assignments are due next week.. to be detailed.. its due tomorrow..
fuck it!
last night party was cool.. many ppl come.. but im frustrated coz i have to work in the fucking cold winter day which is about 40 fahranheit.. my hands got freeze burn.. i risk my life for several fucking dollar bills.. well.. this is not the first time already.. i was wondering i will be paid better this week.. but eventually not.. too much expectations..
watever.. talk bout sth nice.. met and finally know china ppl in my class.. taking the advantage of CNY to get close with them.. opps.. my main target only tat gal la.. haha.. know her name.. walk back to my car together.. but with an extra china boy.. get to know her a little more.. eventually she asked me do i play qq? omg.. sorry no~ then she asked my phone number as a "reason" to know more bout buying cars stuff.. i hope thats an excuse.. well.. feel that she is kinda sweet as she called my name and say hi to me in class on friday although we did not sit really close.. but but but!! i dun have texting package for my phone.. so fail!! zz probably she texted me and wondered why i did not reply.. haha.. just thinking.. btw.. im a fucking dull and working mania now.. no schedule for dating now yet..
CNY party is kinda awesome.. eat too much food till feel vomiting as i was too hungry and sat around the food table for almost an hour non stop eating.. well.. it turns out not that cool as i cant drink and i cant stay up late... coz i have to work the next early morning.. haiz..! my life is such a pity..
well.. many ppl think that.. wah~~ so nice.. you can go usa study.. ur family is so rich.. when they say that.. i can only smile.. coz i will never tell them all my stories.. and they cant understand it as well.. so next time.. if someone has read this post.. please dun say that to me.. coz i feel that ur just a hypocrite ass.. i dun have money.. neither do my family.. but i got hands to make the money.. is the answer cool? u aint have hands to earn the money.. but u got hands to grab money from ur parents.. tats not cool.. alright.. dun wanna bullshit around anymore as no one can understand how terrible my life has ever been undergoing.. solitude ? loneliness? stress? anger? from sch? opps.. stress from sch is just piece of cake.. to me.. those shits ur complaining about everyday.. i can eat it up without doubts..
haiz.. graduation is coming.. that indicates unemployment.. which is not delightful at all. dad and mum want to come.. but they have no intention to stay to help up my sis when she is giving birth.. well.. no complaints.. but.. tat makes me real stressful as i worked so terribly hard for several months.. just to buy their air tickets and expenses.. i paid half of my tuition fees on my own.. its 4000 usd.. rm12000.. wow.. its alot man.. i just knew that.. and the money left.. still have to spend.. work from 8am morning till 11pm night? i did it.. fingers freeze burn.. legs numb.. face chili red.. body overheated.. my friends asked me why so eager for money? need to work like that? well.. for money sake.. but not for myself for my parents.. i aint complaining.. but my better suggestion is to send the money back home.. feeling that is more realistic.. however, the decision still falls on them..
anyway.. i hope i can have my life back after my graduation.. i dun really expect my parents to attend my graduation ceremony.. really.. i just want my normal 22 year old life back..

peyton first day in schooL

wow.. Vibrations- DR Engin..
he repeated his old story.. about how he gets his phd.. about CHINDIA and so on..
Capstone DEsign- Dr Nelson..
he said he is so disappointed with our final project report last sem.. probably he is talking bout my group..
Statistic- Farmer
well.. first time having class in math building i have finally seen some asians.. and quite pretty one o~~ =D wish to know them soon..
World of literature-SIm
thought this class will be easy but it always come out the other way.. =( well.. only 3 men in class.. others are without gugu one.. =( but din see any cantik one.. sad.. many o o de.. =(
hope this sem will be fun.. and all As this time!!!!